So, I had a serious break down today.
PTSD is trying to kill me and at the same time, someone inside my family who I love very much is most likely not be with us much longer.

Like I said before, this is my first April without my mask and it’s extremely hard for me to deal with. I didn’t know that I could feel so much. And all at the same time.

When you shield yourself away from your feelings to cope with things that you shouldn’t have to cope with on a young age. (Actually, you shouldn’t have to cope with it on any age) it’s not like that your completely numb.
You still feel,  it’s just not as strong. More ….dim.
This allows you to keep going.
The human mind really is amazing that way.

But when you,  for whatever reason, lose that mask, that ability to shut…