Tag Archives: kindness

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Goodness


As I look at the electronic feeds and printed stories, it is almost overwhelming.  There is so much news coming out of every country that is violent, filled with hate, intolerance and xenophobia.

 

And yet, down through history, there have been people who have gone against the tide and reached out with compassion and kindness.  People who have changed the lives of others, through their goodness and light.  They didn’t do this for personal gain.  They just reached out to the unwanted, the marginalized, the “others” that their neighbors feared.  Their courage and caring led the way for them, as it should for us.

 

May their examples lead our way.

 

Namaste,

Barbara

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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Is This Child Safe?


 

 

I have been thinking about holidays and children. Not just American children, but children in the UK and children in India. I have been worrying about children in Russia and in Jamaica.

 

I have been thinking of children who don’t have good role models or lunch money. I have been thinking about children who are afraid and ones who like to look at books and yet they can’t read. They can’t write their names. This is for all the children around the globe, every last noisy, coughing, running, laughing, crying, dirty, sassy one of them. I hope they have someone to hug them tonight when they go to bed and I hope they did not see violence today.

If the Child is Safe

We pray for children

who sneak popsicles before supper,

who erase holes in math workbooks,

who can never find their shoes.

 

And we pray for those

who stare at photographers from behind barbed wire,

who can’t bound down the street in a new pair of sneakers.

who never counted ” potatoes”,

who are born in places we wouldn’t be caught dead,

who never go to the circus,

who live in an x-rated world.

 

We pray for children

who bring us sticky kisses and fistfulls of dandelions,

who hug us in a hurry and forget their lunch money.

 

And we pray for those

who never get dessert,

who have no safe blanket to drag behind them, who watch their parents die,

who can’t find any bread to steal,

who don’t have any rooms to clean up,

whose pictures aren’t on anybody’s dresser,

whose monsters are real.

 

We pray for children

who spend all their allowance before Tuesday,

who throw tantrums in the grocery store and pick at their food,

who like ghost stories,

who shove dirty clothes under the bed, and never rinse the tub,

who get visits from the tooth fairy,

who don’t like to be kissed in front of the carpool,

who squirm in church or temple and scream in the phone,

whose tears we sometimes laugh at and

whose smiles can make us cry.

 

And we pray for children who want to be carried

and for those who must,

for those we never give up on and for those who don’t get a second chance.

For those we smother…and for those who will grab

the hand of anybody kind enough to offer it.

—Marian Wright Edelman

 

This time of year, everyone is looking for presents. Some people just have everything or you don’t know them well enough to be certain to find the right present. A lot of time gets wasted on trying to find the perfect item. Well, I have a suggestion. You can go to Heifer.com and decide how much you want to spend. Your money will be added to others and a flock of chicks, ducks or geese will be sent to a village where there is extreme famine and poverty. You can send a part of a cow or goat. It is your choice. These gifts will help to feed their owners and the animals can breed and everyone is better off. You get a card to send to your friend or relative and the family or village gets what you pick for them. Perhaps, this year because of your kindness, there will be more children who will not go hungry and will be ever so grateful for the kind stranger who helped fill their belly.

 

Heifer.com is an organization which has been around for seventy years. They provide livestock and environmentally sound agricultural training to improve the lives of people who struggle to have reliable sources of food. They are currently working in thirty countries.

 

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What we can do for a child of this world.

What we can do for a child of this world.

 

 

 

Children around the world playing. We can help them to continue to do so.

Children around the world playing. We can help them to continue to do so.

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Teaching Peace


Le Petit Journal posted this video in the aftermath of the Paris attacks, and I wanted to share it with you.  It is important that we teach Peace to our children, and that we make sure they do not grow up afraid of others, because fear breeds hatred and violence.  There will always be bad men, but good men can overcome them with Peace, Love, Compassion, Kindness and Gentleness; and, yes, Flowers and Candles.

Namaste,
Barbara The Idealistic RebelParisPeaceSign

 

 

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Intentions


It is true that many of us have been traumatized by life. Some a few times and others many times. There are times that a person feels like they just can’t get up again. Some commit suicide and some soldier on. Some go through life broken, perhaps bandaged up and some having buttons that when pushed, trigger violent verbal responses that you are amazed are coming out of the person.

 

Trauma leaves very deep scars. Physical trauma leaves exterior scars, but the emotional scars leave deep scars. Therapy helps. Medication may help.Some scars keep you from loving and committing another because you feel vulnerable. Some scars keep you from loving yourself.

 

” Love is the way messengers from the mystery tell us things.

Love is the mother.

We are her children.

 

She shines inside us,

visible-invisible, as we trust

lost trust, or feel it start to grow again.”

—Rumi

 

Do You Love Me

 

“A lover asked his beloved,

Do you love yourself more

than you love me?

 

The Beloved replied,

I have died to myself

and I live for you.

 

I’ve disappeared from myself

and my attributes.

I am present only for you.

 

I have forgotten all my learnings,

but from knowing you

I have become a scholar.

I have lost all my strength,

but from your power

I am able.

 

If I love myself

I love you.

If I love you

I love myself.”

—Rumi

 

Love is not easy. No matter how long you know a spouse, partner, friend or even children. It can be the most joyous thing to ever happen to us and it can be the most mistaken and destructive. A doctor once told me that a broken heart can be really broken and he meant it the physical sense. I am not sure but I think he is right. When my husband died, my heart broke and I could feel it.

 

There are so many people and situations which can hurt us temporarily or for a long time. Turning our minds and hearts to meditation, positive thinking, forgiveness mixed  with gentleness, compassion, kindness and caring can repair the mental and emotional damage.

 

It takes work to convince a person you care for them and you are there for them, but it is worth the effort. In America, in the twenty first century many people live alone. Trust issues, a lack of love and terrible fear of being vulnerable can stop the circle. The broken heart, trusting a person or God (however, you think of God ) is one of the important life lessons.

 

Just one more thing, deciding to stay alone, you don’t need people, you don’t want people around very often enforces the buttons and issues from the past. Neurologists are working on the parts of the mind that hold on to those past hurts, pains and suffering.

 

” When the effort passing step by step,

Experiencing stages, recognizing states, ‘

Becomes so filled with love and

light and compassion,

Then it recognizes this love and light

and compassion on every side.

And there is nothing to which one is unattached,

When the love transcending self recognizes

self no longer,

When the compassion transcending self feels

equally the pain of all,

When the mercy transcending self sends

blessing and healing everywhere,

When self becomes love and there is nothing

left to love…

O that transforming wonder of redeeming light!

O that bliss of transcendental bathing!

O that wondrous calm of the life of life!

When time is gone and  bodies are no longer,

The dark night of sleep is ended,

The dark sleep of night is gone;

The eye perceiving pierces all veils

And only suffering is dead.”

—excerpt from In the Garden by Sufi Ahmed Murad

 

 

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My religion is LOVE

My religion is LOVE

 

 

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Working Together for Peace


Israelis and Palestinians Join Forces to March for Peace Together

by John Vibes, October 20,2015 on thefreethoughtproject.com.

In recent months, news of violence between Israelis and Palestinians has become more frequent than ever. However, last week hundreds of Israelis, Palestinians, and other nationalities joined together to march for peace in Jerusalem and Washington.

The protests were associated with a three-day BDS solidarity wave with other demonstrations that were held at Israeli embassies in cities across Europe and South America.

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The protests in Washington were primarily directed at the massive military aid packages that Israel receives from the US.

Nejwa Ali, a Palestinian-American from Buffalo, New York told reporters, “I’ve been to Palestine before and witnessed occupation, intentional discrimination and murder of Palestinians by the Israeli military, the U.S. Government supports Israel with $3 billion a year and the Americans need to know.”

Although there is still an unfortunate amount of racism in the Middle East, most of the hate is generally fueled and stirred up by the politicians who benefit from and thrive on it, and this hateful sentiment is not shared by the vast majority of the general population.

While the politicians and military leaders continue to promote hate and violence, there are more and more situations popping up that are showing the path towards a more peaceful future. Many groups and individuals are stepping up, risking their public reputations and their lives to speak out for what they believe is right. What is even better is that average people are working to apply their own skills and talents towards bringing the Palestinians and Israelis together.

For years, peace activists in Palestine have been teaming up with other peace activists in Israel as well as the United States and Iran to spread a message of love and unity among people of all geographical locations…..regardless of what all the crazy politicians say.

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Some of the most popular of these efforts is the Palestine loves Israel and Israel loves Palestine campaigns, which started out as a viral Facebook phenomena where Palestinians and Israelis would send messages of love to one another and reassure each other that the hateful rhetoric put forward by governments and media outlets are totally out of line with the true feelings of the average person.

Also, just last year an Israeli metal band called Orphaned Land joined forces with the Palestinian band Khalas for an 18 gig tour that visited 6 different countries. The purpose of the tour was to promote peace and unity between the Palestinian and Israeli people. The bands even lived together and shared a tour bus throughout the duration of their travels.

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As most of you know I am 100% for peace. WWII was the only righteous war. I am always advocating for peace and my heart is full tonight with thoughts for peace.We need peace in our own hearts and peace in our families. We need to stop all abuse in our families. We need peace in America and Congress needs to actually do what they were elected for. We need peace in the world.

Peace in palestine and Israel would be a defining moment in the history of our world. I encourage you to follow what is happening in the Middle East. We must all put a halt on revenge, hatred, and judgment.

I can no more understand the suspicion of those who are different now than when I was a child. One of the great strengths of humankind is that we are different. People of different nationalities make a beautiful picture. We don’t need to all worship alike, or look alike. We don’t need to speak alike.We are all children of the Universe and as such we do have a responsibility to make peace as often as we can. We need to get out of our own heads and find the similarities between us and use  them to understand one another better, to love one another better. We need to know that we may be writers, photographers, musicians, painters and mimes but we can speak through our work. We need to show how much that love, gentleness, compassion, kindness and concern can change our lives and the lives of those around.

Whether, you have a spiritual path or are an atheist, we take care of each other, we must care about the lives and trials of the other people in the world. When the hatred of some humans, explodes one day, we will lose many material things and people that we love and care about. It will be too late then. I do not have the personality to run a country, and yet I know that our Congress is not performing their job descriptions and are therefore, letting American citizens down.

Many good men and women laid down their lives during the Revolutionary War to give us freedom. The Constitution needs to be respected and honored as well as the memories of those who fought and designed our Bill of Rights and our Constitution.

Some times, while watching the news, and they are interviewing Congress, I wonder what George Washington, Thomas Jefferson, Paul Revere, Benjamin Franklin, John Adams among others would think about what is happening and often not happening in Congress.  The Founding Fathers had their own differences but they worked through them and designed a country that is the greatest democracy ever. So work for peace, work for good communications, accept what is different and cherish this planet that we were given. As I have said before, there is no Planet B.

Namaste

Barbara

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Mountain stream Photograph and copyright by Barbara Mattio 2015

Mountain stream
Photograph and copyright by Barbara Mattio 2015

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Compassion – Another View


 

I watched this TED talk and laughed and cried. I want us all to live in a world where enemies become friends and where compassion is more important than being right. I want there to be no marginalized people. I like the idea of kinship. I hope you all enjoy this talk and take the spirit of the talk to heart. Be blessed. Hugs, Barbara

 

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What Artists Need


Creative people, or we could say artists, have some needs to be able to fully access their creativity.

They need to love and to be loved. We, as creative people, need intimate relationships, emotional and intellectual friendships. Creative people need wide-ranging relationships. They also need human warmth, the occasional handshake. They need people who respect their work and who respect and care about them.

 

They need love, intimacy, and friendship more than they need gallery shows or tenure. The flow of love through our human lives is what we need and what we must attain.

 

Relating needs to be more than a nice idea. Creative people need to relate well to others. Van Gogh loved the idea of complement as an essential life accomplishment. He looked at human relationships and color relationships to be essential. He loved to use blue and yellow in his paintings and he felt that men and women need to and can support one another in life. The inability to accomplish this is one of the thousands of reasons for depression.

 

Creative people can be great composers, painters, writers, a great intellectual or a great soul. We need to climb down off of our high horses, tear our enemies lists to shreds. We need to stop criticizing and blaming others for our own failures. We are special but not completely unique.

 

Therapists suggest that artists consciously make a point of caring for others. Give without taking.

Feel, rather than steel yourself to the actions and comments of others. Count to ten and perhaps count more than once.

 

Manage your ego. Someone else’s success is not a personal affront to you. Moderate selfishness. Share credit when it is earned. We have hungers and desires but so does every living human being. Reduce your sense of injury. Let the old hurts which continue to haunt you go. Open up and let them drift away. They are heavy baggage.

Buddha told a story about an angry man. He had been injured emotionally by someone. He held that anger like a charcoal briquette just out of the fire. He held on to it day after day and in the end, he was the only one injured. He had a terribly bad burn and the other person was just fine and went on with their life as always. The angry man was scarred for life.

 

We live in a harsh world and it needs every bit of beauty we can add to it. It also needs our kindness, gentleness, compassion and love. These can change the world. Not completely, but it can and will make a difference. It can start with all of us.

 

 Photograph and copyright by Barbara Mattio 2013

                               Black Mountain, NC

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How do Creative People Repair Themselves?


 

People are harmed by certain experiences like being abused, discounted, lied to, shamed, beaten, ignored, tyrannized and hated. People are harmed by encountering too many disappointments, rejections, criticisms, unfulfilled dreams, and unsuccessful outcomes.

 

Creative people often feel the pain of these experiences more deeply than the accountants and the business moguls. Many creative people are born with depression, anxiety or family love. Every human being is hurt in some way by the people of the world. We can find it harder to live, care, try and be calm. Most of us, in some time of our lives realized, we need repair. But how do we make that happen?

 

This question is dangerous because it indicates that there is only one way for you or I to repair or heal ourselves. There is just one answer to the question.

 

Often, it is difficult to begin to do the self repair work. The damage is everywhere. It is in the brain. It is in the way we breathe, in the way we see, and what we are attracted to. Often, when we know that we are emotionally injured, we try to repress it or to pretend there is nothing wrong. What humans become during war shows the power of emotional damage on the human psyche.

 

Support, from friends, a psychotherapist and loved ones, uses our creative gifts to heal the self and are often successful. Talking to your subconscious and reassuring it that you are safe and in no danger can help. Talking to a therapist can help. reveling in your successes can help. Creating the beautiful art to fill the world can help. Artists, all kinds of artists, are very important in the world. No matter what your media is, you add to the beauty, kindness, compassion and love in the world. Even if you have no one close to you who gives you unconditional support, be your own support. Believe in yourself.

 

Friends are very important to “listen and support” during the down days. And don’t forget your family, your “WordPress family” who will be honest with you. I have found that readers are honest and forthcoming with good advice.

 

Musicians, writers, photographers and painters, print makers, sketchers all have the fullness of creative ability. Some of the most highly respected artists felt some days that they had no talent.

Gauguin, Van Gogh, Rembrandt, for instance all went through periods when they felt they had no talent. Some of their “friends” encouraged this thinking. But over a hundred years in the future we consider them some of arts’ masters. Follow your heart and the needs of your soul. If your hands want to write, then do so. If your eyes want to see a mountain through a lens, then allow it.

 

There is discussion about making sure that students who are majoring in math and science all be given art classes. This is to help them be able to deal with people better, to develop ideas better, and to enrich their lives.

 

” I cannot help it that my pictures do not sell. The time will come when people will see that my paintings are worth more than the price of the paint and my own living.”

—Vincent Van Gogh

 

“Let us keep courage and try to be patient and gentle. And not mind being eccentric, and make distinction between good and evil.”

—Vincent Van Gogh

 

“Do you know what frees one from this captivity? It is every deep serious affection. Being friends, being brothers, love, these open the prison by supreme power, by some magic force. Where sympathy is renewed, life is restored.”

—Vincent Van Gogh

 
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Lake Michigan

Lake Michigan

 

Inner Peace

Inner Peace

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Life is Important


A few days ago, I posted a piece about ISIS deliberately impregnated a nine year old girl. This little girl experienced rape and trauma to her little body. Today, ISIS is surrounding another Iraqi city. I want to thank you all for your comments on my initial post. Please add your prayers to your comments.

 

There are many people in the world who have lost their respect for human life. All life is created by Divinity. All life, human or otherwise, is precious and does not deserve ill-treatment. Impregnating a woman or a girl is power and control. It is humiliating the female and wanting her family to shun her. This is a way to destroy the life of the female and to devastate her family. It also raises a new generation that would be damaged emotionally by the circumstances of their lives and families.

 

Now that ISIS is surrounding another Iraqi city, the city may collapse. If it does, there are thousands of lives at risk. Men and women captured and tortured and possibly killed as so many others have been. Women and girls raped or gang raped. Why? Because they are different, they call their God a different name.

 

Yet, down through history, the different names of a Divine Being have separated human beings from each other. These Divine Names are the reason for wars, atrocities, rapes, and mass murders. Hundreds of humans have died throughout the centuries because civilizations and countries have at times lost their respect for human life. WWII is one example. Millions of people were killed because of who they were but also because of who and what they weren’t.

 

For people to rape and impregnate children, there is a disconnect between their minds and their emotions. Many are psychopaths and feel no emotion. Not just people in ISIS but even some American citizens. The elderly have no use or meaning to these people and neither do women of any age. A world where life has no meaning is a terrifying and devastating place for us to be in.

 

Life is important. It has meaning that many don’t want to acknowledge. The meaning of life carries us to kindness, compassion, love and joy. These attributes carry us to peace. A lack of these attributes carries us to war. What is war good for?  NOTHING.