It is true that many of us have been traumatized by life. Some a few times and others many times. There are times that a person feels like they just can’t get up again. Some commit suicide and some soldier on. Some go through life broken, perhaps bandaged up and some having buttons that when pushed, trigger violent verbal responses that you are amazed are coming out of the person.


Trauma leaves very deep scars. Physical trauma leaves exterior scars, but the emotional scars leave deep scars. Therapy helps. Medication may help.Some scars keep you from loving and committing another because you feel vulnerable. Some scars keep you from loving yourself.


” Love is the way messengers from the mystery tell us things.

Love is the mother.

We are her children.


She shines inside us,

visible-invisible, as we trust

lost trust, or feel it start to grow again.”



Do You Love Me


“A lover asked his beloved,

Do you love yourself more

than you love me?


The Beloved replied,

I have died to myself

and I live for you.


I’ve disappeared from myself

and my attributes.

I am present only for you.


I have forgotten all my learnings,

but from knowing you

I have become a scholar.

I have lost all my strength,

but from your power

I am able.


If I love myself

I love you.

If I love you

I love myself.”



Love is not easy. No matter how long you know a spouse, partner, friend or even children. It can be the most joyous thing to ever happen to us and it can be the most mistaken and destructive. A doctor once told me that a broken heart can be really broken and he meant it the physical sense. I am not sure but I think he is right. When my husband died, my heart broke and I could feel it.


There are so many people and situations which can hurt us temporarily or for a long time. Turning our minds and hearts to meditation, positive thinking, forgiveness mixed  with gentleness, compassion, kindness and caring can repair the mental and emotional damage.


It takes work to convince a person you care for them and you are there for them, but it is worth the effort. In America, in the twenty first century many people live alone. Trust issues, a lack of love and terrible fear of being vulnerable can stop the circle. The broken heart, trusting a person or God (however, you think of God ) is one of the important life lessons.


Just one more thing, deciding to stay alone, you don’t need people, you don’t want people around very often enforces the buttons and issues from the past. Neurologists are working on the parts of the mind that hold on to those past hurts, pains and suffering.


” When the effort passing step by step,

Experiencing stages, recognizing states, ‘

Becomes so filled with love and

light and compassion,

Then it recognizes this love and light

and compassion on every side.

And there is nothing to which one is unattached,

When the love transcending self recognizes

self no longer,

When the compassion transcending self feels

equally the pain of all,

When the mercy transcending self sends

blessing and healing everywhere,

When self becomes love and there is nothing

left to love…

O that transforming wonder of redeeming light!

O that bliss of transcendental bathing!

O that wondrous calm of the life of life!

When time is gone and  bodies are no longer,

The dark night of sleep is ended,

The dark sleep of night is gone;

The eye perceiving pierces all veils

And only suffering is dead.”

—excerpt from In the Garden by Sufi Ahmed Murad






My religion is LOVE

My religion is LOVE



Baby Steps for Peace

Photo by Barbara Mattio

So here we are. We realize that peace must begin within ourselves. Okay, now what? It is easier to be forgiving from a distance. It is easier to just look away and not see missed opportunities.

There are ways for us to begin. It starts with little things. Giving respect to those who deserve it. Picking up a fallen object for an elderly person. You can not scream at the kids when you have just had the worst day in your career. You can take cake to a new neighbor and say welcome.
You can be flexible with your friends and really care what is happening in their lives. When you can get through the day without a moment when you think, wow I shouldn’t have done that. You have begun to add peace to your journey. The person at the bank that made a mistake and you chose not to be short or mean to them will carry that kindness forward. They will hold the door for a young mother with a baby in arms and a toddler next to her. She will get home late from her errands with 2 crying children. She will sing them lullabies as they fall asleep.
The next day the toddler goes to a play date and is very kind to the other children. And so on and so on.

It is easy to say it begins with me, but assume that others should be the ones to start practicing peace. It is each of us, the 7 billion + people who need to throw the first stone into the ocean of hatred and violence.
Violence grows the same way as peace does. A neighbor fights with another neighbor. They are very angry and others take sides. This escalates the anger and fear enters as others begin to look at each other in distrust. Governments don’t keep promises. Politics become more important than agreements. Nations argue and then war becomes a topic of discussion.

We each need to make peace in our own lives. At times, it takes walking away. Sometimes it takes loving someone more than we love ourselves. We need to remember that we are not alone in our desire to live in a peaceful world. The Divinity that dwells within us wants that also. We make our own decisions and we must accept responsibility for the lack of peace in our own lives. We must hold elected officials to govern in a peaceful manner without ego and without a quest for power.

I encourage everyone to walk the path of peace as well as to talk it. It isn’t enough to just say we need World Peace. We have to live it in our lives each day. Others will respond to the peace within. For the times you lose your own peace, it is okay. Just start again with a fresh slate. Just don’t give up because The One has never given up on us.

Photo by Barbara Mattio

Photo by Barbara Mattio