As women in modern society, women are told to do a lot of things. We are told to talk, to shut up and to sit down. We are told to speak up and to quit talking. Life for women, has been like this for Millenniums. One way women have been able to survive this subservient treatment has been to get to know who she really is and what she wants to be. To survive the patriarchal hierarchy, women have to be certain of themselves and who they are. How do we do this? Solitude. Solitude, aloneness, peace are what we need to discover ourselves.
Alice Koller was a PHD from Harvard University. Her doctorate was in Philosophy. She realized she couldn’t find meaning in here work, or in her relationships with men, she felt she had reached bottom. So Alice decided to take a journey. She decided to take a journey inside to find who she really was. She rented a small house on Nantucket. She bought a puppy and determined to stay until she understood who the woman was she saw every morning in the mirror.
A red Kayak. Photographed and copyrighted by Barbara Mattio 2014
An Unknown Woman, is the story of her journey to herself. The book was written at the beginning of the sixties and the women’s movement. I am sure Alice isn’t the first to go looking for herself, nor will she be the last. I am sure you will understand her friends thought she was crazy. She was determined to find the source of her unhappiness. She realized that there was no place where she wanted to be, where she belonged, or where she could go. Solitary walks on the beach with her puppy and surviving a winter on the Nantucket shore kept her pretty busy. I do suggest you read the book or take a similar journey in your lives. Ladies, remember there is nothing wrong with alone as long as you choose your solitude. Good luck to everyone journeying to find themselves.
I will have to find a copy Barbara. I have just been reading A Passage to Power by Leslie Kenton (about menopause) which details her very similar journey. It made me realise that my choosing to isolate myself in those times I can and my inner quests to find my own sources of discontent were a healthy thing and something I needed to do, they have provided me with the chance to learn who I am really after a lifetime of not knowing…and to heal “stuff”.
The book should even be available at the library and on Kindle. Have a good journey. Hugs, Barbara
Love these pictures!
Thanks Jackie. I appreciate your opinion. Hugs, Barbara
Finding self is so important, otherwise you shuffle through life measuring your worth by whom you’re with. Yes, the most important thing in life is to be satisfied with yourself, to enjoy your own company – everything else follows
Yes. And I have enjoyed my times alone. I like my company, while still loving people. It is always a surprise when you meet yourself for the first time. Hugs, Barbara
superb and brilliant blog!!