Just What is Domestic Violence?

I have begun again to volunteer at a Domestic Violence shelter here in North Carolina. It feels good to be back once again to the cause the helped to form me as a feminist.


Domestic Violence is not only physical, emotional, sexual and psychological violence. Psychological violence is intense and repetitive degradation, creating isolation and controlling the actions or behaviors of the victim through intimidation or manipulation to the detriment of the individual.


A battering incident is rarely an isolated event. Battering tends to increase and gradually become more severe as time goes on.


The newest stats show us that 85% of women experience at least one incident of battering in her lifetime. One in three women are abused emotionally and physically.


Domestic violence is a pattern of behaviors used to establish power and control over another intimate partner that often leads to the threat or use of violence. Many victims suffer multiple forms of abuse. Approximately 40% of women report that the first assault by their partner occured during pregnancy.


Physical abuse includes but is not limited to hitting, spitting, biting, pinching, slapping, twisting an arm, punching, or tripping. After the first assault, the abuse may be frequent or infrequent, prolonged or brief, severe or mild. The purpose is to gain power and control over the intimate partner.


Victims of emotional abuse often say that it takes longer to recover from emotional abuse than most physical abuse. It can take a lifetime to heal from emotional assaults. Anyone can be abused, male or female, straight or homosexual. And there is no excuse or reason that is ever acceptable for the Domestic Violence. There is no legitimate or viable reason to hit an intimate partner.


There are laws to protect victims in every state in the continental United States. There are also laws in Hawaii, Alaska and all 0f the US possessions. There is relief for every victim of battering.


There are many reasons for Domestic Violence and each are true to a certain degree. Each carries a certain amount of truth. Primarily, the theories distract police and the court system from the real truth. It works! Battering allows the perpetrator to get what they want. It is really that simple.


More than 1 in 3 women (35.6%) of women and more than 1 in 4 men (28.5%) of men in the United States experience Domestic Violence during their lifetimes. They have experienced rape, physical violence, and /or stalking by an intimate partner. This is from the National Intimate Partner and Sexual Violence Survey: 2010 report.


It is a crime to commit Domestic Violence and marital rape is a crime in all states and all American possessions. We have to stop the violence.


Peace on Earth begins at home. No More Violence! 






     Domestic Violence


This is what an abused child looks like.

This is what an abused child looks like.


The majority of victims are strangled at least once. often before a homicide.

The majority of victims are strangled at least once. often before a homicide.

10 thoughts on “Just What is Domestic Violence?

  1. Good for you, Barbara. I’m so glad you are willing to help these women and children. May the Lord bless you and your efforts to inform the public of this heinous crime and to volunteer to help the victims! 🙂 ❤

  2. kraftycatcreations says:

    Unfortuately, any domestic abuse other than physical is very difficult to prove. Also, it may take the victim a while to even understand what is going on.

    • Actually, physical violence is usually accompanied with emotional violence. Sexual violence also often accompanies physical abuse. Sometimes hard to prove, but we are trained to know how to present the case in court and public awareness is increasing every day so it is easier to get justice for the victim. Hugs, Barbara

      • kraftycatcreations says:

        Glad to know things are changing for the better. Although I was married for 25 years, and got divorced over 10 years ago, I have just started having flashbacks and can feel the rage he aimed at me. I have also just started getting counseling. Never too late.xxx

  3. kraftycatcreations says:

    I am glad you are bringing attention to this issue through your blog and work. Kudos!

    • I have worked for over twenty years in DV in two states. It is the primary one of my causes.
      I just moved to North Carolina for my health and to be nearer to my best friend and some of my children. So the time is right as I am also retired now. Thank you for stopping and reading my blog and for the time to write your comments. Hugs, Barbara

  4. Al says:

    Unfortunately, in this country a wife raping a husband is not a crime.

    Well done for working in that environment.

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